Special: Breaking off Taboos

Here are Rules. Rules I was taught never to break.

• Never leave set strike/clean-up before the end. Ever. It's impolite and will cost you involvement. Linking arms with Jenna Cindy and leaving just for shits and giggles is NOT cool. Do you have any idea how it feels to the rest of us when you just leave like eight people with a pile of shit? Schultz was injured. I can excuse that, I don't know what her life was like. I have no idea. Maybe she ran like twelve miles today, she could presumably have done something other than sit in the green room and think and apply makeup. Which I have done, and is not tiring. I don't know, that's my point. I don't know, maybe she really was tired. You two others who skipped out for fun party time with Schultz? Bullshit. It's a card, and I'm pulling it. You just left me. How do you think that makes me feel?
• If you say you're going to be somewhere, be somewhere. No exceptions, barring serious shit. Really, really serious shit; not the type Aleve can cure. 
• No wiping spirit gum in the Green Room sink. This isn't an official rules, but I stayed up FOR HOURS wiping that shit out with a safety pin. Then chemicals. It still isn't out. 
• Clean up after yourself. Don't just throw it in a pile and call it quits. Don't leave shit all over the counter so I can spend the night re-organizing it and throwing it away because your half-day ass wanted a nap.
• Include people as much as possible. Don't isolate yourself in a corner and act superior, it's rude to your fellow theater lovers.
• Keep your temper even as long as possible. You're tired? Guess what. I'm tired too. It doesn't matter. We're serving the art we love and you signed up to do this. 
• Talk to people. Be willing to listen and compromise. 
• I don't know if this is a theater rule, but you know what? Don't be a fucking pessimist. If I'm standing there and I Smile and you go, "What is it, Payton?" And I go, "This is Finley's and I's First dance," your response shouldn't be to roll your eyes at each other and tap dance on my face.
• I'm allowed to have breaks. People don't consider it; but I was there through all this. I was there months ago when Katie, Hannah, and John started planning this. I sat in on their meetings, I helped them think it through, I spent over fifty dollars on this that nobody's reimbursed me for. 

The person who broke most of them
is the one that taught them to me in the first place.

And I'm tired. I'm tired, and I'm grumpy,
and my heart hurts from feeling so many people at once in one small area.
So, so many people.

I'm just....

Angry. I'm so angry at the people who swore, who swore they'd be there to help, and now aren't.

Why does that keep happening to me?
To John, to Katie? People who WORKED THEIR ASSES OFF got nothing because other people are dicks. That's SHIT! Why does this happen?!

GRRR!