Special

Another night for Holmes and Tudors, except that for wanting them I find myself despising both. My, this would be a night for friends, but you know how it is in the summer: people use the time to rest. Hannah obliges curfew, Finley obliges the silly need for sleep most people have, Katie's mending hearts in Superior, and most everybody else is dreaming.

I don't like dreaming.

Last night, I literally dreamt that I dug a fetus out of my breast. A dead baby fetus. DAN'S baby. How fucked up is that? Seriously!

I don't like dreaming,
and I don't want to sleep.

I want something to do, though. I don't want to sit still.


I wish there was someone else with my sleep deprivation. Someone who, magically, would wake up and go, "I must look for who is in trouble!!" like I do.

But there isn't, and they don't.

After all, they aren't me.

Special... yeah... it's a blast....


Cleaning Jess' Kitchen tomorrow, and, more likely, the comprehensive version is that I'll end up doing her mother's house. Must be a test of my skills.... delightful.

Schultz invited me to help her move and I noticed that all--I mean ALL--of her students are friends with her now. I'm like, what is this? I had to wait!

It isn't a like thing though. It's just that she would have gotten in trouble at the time, and there's no reason to invite reprimand down from the fool's kingdom, needless to say. Still... circumstance can be delicious for the taunting of us, sometimes--to say the least!

Mm.... God, would you send me a friend tonight?

Some one to talk my troubles to,
just for the sake of talking
would do my screaming heart
a  lot of good.

Screaming for company...
how happily regular a plight!