I had a very, very happy day with my Katie-bird today. Initially, we meandered to Katie's first house and other house. While we were at the first, Katie told me about a conversation between her and Kate. Apparently Dan is Kate's back friend (before, or after the... well...?), and it sounded like Kate used that as a strike after Katie told her that she was close to me. I hope Kate didn't hurt Katie because we are friends... but apparently, I am Katie's best friend!
If only for today, if only for a moment, I am in Katie-friend's heart. That warms me, and too often, I am cold. Sometimes, it feels like I'm always cold. Speaking of cold, we went to Culver's after that, met Finley there. My whole heart in one place was... I felt loved again. And ever since that day I went to get tuxedo's with the cast and Schultz, my director, I haven't felt like that. I've felt awkward... discarded... like a freak.
After that, we went home and I changed into the velvet dress Finley had given me--the one who reminds me of Example--
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bAgegxdVdFU
Watch the sun come up.
Except, Katie and I more watched it go down. We took pictures and it was cold and our hands didn't want to move over our cameras, but that didn't matter. What mattered was that we were happy together, were right together in that way that only real friends can ever be.We were companions, and no matter what waited for us outside that realm of faerie; that realm of gold-tainted trees and singing owls, as long as we were skipping over those mud puddles, it could not travel past the gate.
Amongst our pictures, we were happy. With our cameras, we were free.
We were there.
She took me home, and when we got in her red car, I pictured she and I dancing down the path to music, singing songs that didn't matter, because we knew each other's hearts. Afterward, when I got home, I read Katie's blog. I saw what had happened to her... I was sad for my friend. My heart hurt for my friend.
She's such a good person.. and she's my friend! I have made her herself, just a little more, just a little better... and I want her to be happy. I want her to be happy so much.
It's a better Monday than I've had for a long time, minus the fact that there were absolutely no dishes for me to help Katie and Brad with. I got to be a silly bird and ramshackle the sky of its colors and greet the moon, I got to be wild and climb trees with Katie. I smiled, I laughed; and I was absolutely myself. I think she was, too. I think of her being happy and not being afraid of me, of just being there, and my heart's all right. The things I hear about myself in the hallways don't matter, because I have my friend.
I love you, Katie. And I'm looking for Glee, and my background on the lappytoppy is Cinderella's slipper, and you give me hope. Every day, you give me hope and smiles.
Be happy, okay? Because you'll always be the Wizard to my Princess.
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